The Roller Coaster

When grief is a drowning ocean I look to you When my world is in turmoil I look to you When my shattered heart refuses to beat I look to you When pain is my constant companion I look to you When sorrow is my food I look to you When tears freely fall I look to you When anguish threatens to tear apart I look to you When the future is bleak I look to you When happiness and joy have lost their way I look to you When peace is an elusive memory I look to you When fear and uncertainty whisper I look to you When memories start fading I look to you When the strength to get out of bed has vanished I look to you When regrets torment me  I look to you When the longing swells within I look to you When hopelessness abounds I look to you I look to you My rock and my salvation My fortress and refuge My ever present help in times of trouble The rock I cling to The hope that will not fail I look to you I trust in you 

Hearing Never listening Looking Never seeing Alone in the dark Thoughts a whirlwind Arms wrapped around herself Rivers flowing from her sunken eyes Alone, misplaced When will the sorrow cease? When will the pain subside? When will comfort arrive? When will joy come knocking? The world goes on by Oblivious to the hurting soul Oblivious of the desperate plea within No one stops No time to care Caught up in the rat race of their lives Hearing Never listening Looking Never seeing

I miss you more than you know Not seeing your face brings tears to my eyes I want to hear your voice again The joyful peels of your laughter A huge gaping hole has replaced my heart A hole no one can fill I want to be where you are I want to embrace you once again When will this pain go away? When will I be numb to your absence? My heart is broken within me Tears are my food Sorrow my dessert You fill my mind Questions pester me Regrets creep silently in Oh how I wish I could turn back time There would be so many things I would do differently I would spend every waking moment with you I would never lose my temper I would always be patient I would never complain I would always serve you I love you so much Without you I feel so lost and alone So hopeless I fear my life will never be the same I fear sorrow will engulf me I fear I will taste no more joy I fear life without you